Jose Cuervo, You Are A Friend Of Mine
by lovesrainscent
Summary: Original Aburame/Inuzuka/Hyuuga team. Shibi/Tsume/Hiashi. Shibi has just been promoted to jounin, the first one of the team to be elevated to that rank. Tsume produces a bottle of liquor, specifically tequila, to help celebrate the occasion.


**Title: **Jose Cuervo, You Are A Friend Of Mine

**Author: **Lovesrainscent

**Rating: **T

**Pairing:** Tsume/Hiashi

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto and do not stand to make any profit from posting this story.

**Summary: **Young Shibi/Tsume/Hiashi. Shibi has just been promoted to jounin, the first one of the team to be elevated to that rank. Tsume produces a bottle of liquor, specifically tequila, to help celebrate the occasion. **  
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**Jose Cuervo, You Are A Friend Of Mine**

The three young teammates crossed their old training grounds in the moonlight. The recognition ceremony was completed and they were trooping back to their respective homes, two chuunin and one freshly minted jounin. Pausing before they all went their separate ways for the night, Tsume announced that she had something for Shibi.

"Here you go, gotcha a little present," Tsume said, pilfering through her knapsack and producing a foil lined rectangular box. Shibi accepted it from her and opened it. He pulled a narrow necked bottle capped with a wide cork from the box. The bottle flared gracefully to a wider bottom. Even in the moonlight, Hiashi could see that the liquid inside had a gentle golden color.

The corners of Shibi's mouth twitched up into an uncharacteristic smile, not something Hiashi was accustomed to seeing given his teammate's usually stoic nature.

"Thank you, Tsume," he said simply, accepting her gift.

"Reckoned we could have our own private little celebration," the spiky haired girl replied.

Shibi was holding the bottle up in the moonlight studying the contents carefully. "It is a most thoughtful gift, Tsume. I am touched."

"Yeah, well, you deserve it. Congratulations again. Although don't expect me and Hyuuga to be far behind ya. We're both gonna make jounin before you know it."

Hiashi was kicking himself mentally. Of _course_ protocol in this circumstance would have dictated a gift. He had let his own annoyance at being beaten to jounin level by Shibi Aburame interfere with his social obligations. Such oversight annoyed him further. He stammered out a fib. "I...too...have a gift for you, Shibi, I am sorry I did not bring it this evening..."

His voice trailed off at the shallowness of his white lie. Of course he would_ get _a gift for his teammate just as soon as the shops opened in the morning, it's just that he had _temporarily_ forgotten.

Tsume shot him a look over her shoulder that let him know full well that she knew what he'd done or not done. Hiashi sighed. Shibi would know the transparency of his lie. It puzzled him how his Inuzuka teammate, though seemingly lacking in the social graces that were mandatory within his own clan, always managed to do the _right_ thing when often he himself did not.

She was rummaging in her knapsack again and soon with a triumphant_ ah-ha_ she produced three small glasses. Hiashi would swear Shibi's smile widened. Curious. He looked at the glasses again. They didn't seem like normal sake saucers. They were clear glass, tall and slim with a slightly angled profile.

More items appeared from within the confines of her pack, a lime and a small shallow bowl. When she removed the lid he could see that it contained coarse grained salt.

He looked at Shibi, arching an eyebrow. "What's this?"

Shibi positively grinned. "Tequila. Tsume, where did you _find_ this?"

"Hey, I've got my sources," she chuckled, slicing the lime into sections with her kunai.

Shibi uncorked the bottle and began to fill the three glasses which Tsume had set on a flat rock on the ground in front of them. With alarm, Hiashi noticed something dark in the bottom of the bottle. He examined it closely.

"Shibi, wait, I believe there's something in the bottle...it's a pest of some sort. It's a_ worm."_

Tsume looked at him, one hand on her hip, letting her kunai dangle from the other hand. "Sheesh, Hyuuga, get out much? _Of course_ there's a worm in there. It's tequila."

"More properly," Shibi interjected, "it's a caterpillar, the larval stage of the skipper butterfly. It feeds on the agave plant from which the tequila is produced."

"Whatever. You're not going to drink something that has a _worm_ in it, are you?" Hiashi asked, horrified.

Both Shibi and Tsume were now looking at him in utter amazement. "But it's tequila," Tsume reiterated as if that explained everything.

"You aren't just supposed to drink the tequila, you're supposed to eat the worm. It will give you visions." Shibi added sagely. Then he turned addressing Tsume alone, as if Hiashi wasn't even there. "Tsume has chosen a most appropriate gift for me. The 'worm' as you call it dies in the process of cooking the agave. It in essence gives its life to the production of this most excellent drink. As I shall pledge to give my life in the defense of our village. If you do not choose to share it with us," he turned to look at Hiashi, "that is your loss. I, however, would be honored to share it with you both."

Mortified as his social faux pas, Hiashi sputtered out an answer, "No, of course not, forgive me Shibi, Tsume. It's just that I'm not accustomed to," he started to say _eating-or-drinking-things-with-bugs-in-them _ but decided to go with, "That is, I'm not familiar with the customs around this drink. Please. Enlighten me."

"Sure thing, boss," Tsume said, tossing him a quarter of the lime.

Shibi finished uncorking the bottle, filling the three glasses. "I'm outta here," Tsume's dog Kuromara grumbled. "That stuff is too pungent for me. Tsume, I'll catch you later." He turned and trotted off into the distance.

Shibi reached and handed one glass to each of his teammates then took the third himself. Shocked, Hiashi watched as both his teammates each licked the back of their hand between the thumb and forefinger then took turns touching them to the salt in the shallow bowl so that the coarse grains were stuck to their skin. They then each picked up their own quarter-lime and held it between the thumb and forefinger of the same spit-and-salt-covered hands, the glasses held expectantly in their opposite hands.

"Well?" Tsume asked. "What're you waiting for? We're supposed to drink them together."

"I... well... I'm not sure... how to... do this..." Hiashi answered meekly. Nothing in his reserved Hyuuga nature would let him even contemplate licking any part of his body in front of another person.

"Perhaps you would be more comfortable if Tsume and I show you how it's done?" Shibi asked.

"Yes...please," Hiashi answered weakly, wondering what could possibly come next in this bizarre worm-infested ritual he was somehow involved in.

Shibi looked at Tsume and nodded and grinned. "Ready?"

"Yep," she replied. Then they both licked the salt off their hands, knocked back the entire shot of tequila and bit into their limes, wincing with what Hiashi hoped, at least, was pleasure, although he couldn't possibly see how that was possible. He was making a mental note to buy Shibi a bottle of nice sake, one with those clever little raffia bows about the neck of the bottle and NO worm inside.

"Oh, man, that's great," Tsume grinned.

"Most excellent," Shibi agreed. Hiashi noticed that the grin seemed to hanging around his friend's face.

"Hiashi? You in this time?" Tsume asked.

Oh, dear god, he couldn't say no, but he couldn't, just couldn't... _lick his hand and drink something from a bottle that had a worm in it._

"Of course he is," Shibi answered for him and Hiashi wondered why he considered the Aburame clan member a friend. Nonetheless the two looked at him expectantly waiting for him to ... lick himself. As daintily as possible he trailed just the tip of his tongue along the back of his hand.

"Oh, come on Hiashi, you're gonna need more spit than that if you want the salt to stick," Tsume chided him. "C'mon Shibi, let's reload." Then with the broad flat of her tongue she wet the back of her hand again and dipped it in the salt, Shibi following suit after he refilled their glasses. Hesitantly, Hiashi also dipped his hand in the salt. He tried to hold the lime properly by its two ends, slightly pinched between thumb and forefinger, curved to meet his mouth because, as Tsume said, he was going to need both it and the salt to 'cut' the taste of the tequila. Which begged the question, why would anyone want to drink it then?

"Ready?" his tattooed teammate asked. He nodded but she gave him one last warning. "Look, Hiashi, don't sip it or you'll never get it down. Just lick the salt and knock the whole glass back then bite the lime as quick as you can, got it?"

Feeling ridiculously nervous and self-conscious despite being a Leaf-chuunin and presumed next leader of his clan, Hiashi nodded weakly. Shibi just grinned and said, "Go."

He tried to remember the correct sequence of events. Was it salt/lime/tequila or tequila/salt/lime or...salt/tequila/lime. Yes. That was it. Tsume and Shibi were finished and looked at him. Closing his lavender eyes he delicately licked his hand again and swallowed the liquid fire that Shibi had poured into the glass. He couldn't bite the lime fast enough.

"What IS that stuff?" he gasped, wondering if somehow his friends had slipped diesel fuel in there. The tequila was pungent, smoky and oily, not bad, just strong. Stronger than any sake he'd ever had before, that was for damn sure. And it burned on the way down, it burned his mouth, his throat, the scent of it burned his nose and he could feel the fire behind his eyes even after he'd managed to choke the drink down.

"We told you, it's tequila." Tsume laughed, filling the glasses yet AGAIN. Alarmed, Hiashi wondered if they were finishing the bottle tonight. A bottle of sake that size split between three friends would be nothing unusual. But this... could be a problem. He was already feeling... different.

"Careful, Hiashi, tequila's not like anything you've ever had to drink before. Remember, it will give you visions," Shibi intoned in all seriousness.

"I thought that was the worm?" Hiashi asked, concerned that there might be some psychotropic element other than simply alcohol involved.

Tsume laughed, "Yeah, you get the visions because you've got to get to the bottom of the bottle to get to the worm."

Hiashi flushed gently, whether from the well deserved embarrassment at his friend's gentle joke at his expense or from the warmth spreading through him thanks to the tequila he really couldn't say. "Okay," he finally said, "let's do this again."

"Third time's the charm," Tsume shrugged as all three 'reloaded' as she called it.

Lick. Drink. Bite.

Hiashi thought he executed it a little more smoothly this time.

And this time the fire didn't nearly cause him to choke. This time it spread, uncoiling slowly throughout his body. He felt warmth at the tips of his fingers and the tips of his toes. Fire in his mouth and down his throat but it suffused to a lovely warmth throughout his body. He though even his eyes felt warm.

"Wait a minute," Shibi pointed out, "Hiashi's one down. He's not had three yet."

Tsume concurred and dutifully, with very little prompting needed, Hiashi downed his third shot of tequila.

Extraordinary. He was warm through and through. And _of course_ Shibi knew how high he held him in regard. He'd get him a gift tomorrow and that would be just _swell. _And _of course_ his friends would understand his initial reluctance to participate in this ritual. They were after all great friends, extraordinary shinobi themselves, by God, the best damn team in all of Konoha!

"You know, you guys are the best," Hiashi said loudly. "The best damn ninja I know! Here's to you Shibi!"

"You know, Hiashi, this stuff will sneak up on you," Tsume began.

"I am Hyuuga," Hiashi said, his voice faint with indignation, "nothing 'sneaks up' on me."

"I think it was a figure of speech, Hiashi," Shibi supplied. "Tsume's just concerned that you may not realize how potent this drink is. Perhaps you should hold back."

Well, if ever there was a challenge, Hiashi was convinced that he had just heard one. "Shibi, I can match you man for man, drink for drink, any day. Any day. Any drink. Even this tequila. Let's go again."

Once again, Tsume shrugged as Shibi refilled the glasses. "Go," she said simply, grinning with delight as she knocked back her own, feeling the familiar fire and quenching it just a bit with the tangy lime juice.

"I'm done," she said, setting her glass down and taking a step back.

"Tsume, you're our equal any day, of course you can continue," Hiashi said, trying to encourage her back.

"Oh, no," she laughed. "I know my limits on this one and I know what happens if I go past them. I'll just sit back and watch you two finish your little pissing match."

She took a seat on a log near them and leaned back, grinning wickedly.

"Shall we continue?" Shibi asked.

"Indeed," Hiashi said,

Two more rounds and Hiashi was now quite unsteady on his feet. Shibi stood as steady as ever. He held the bottle up shaking it gently, the worm swishing along in the bottom.

"I think we have enough left for one more shot each. Are you up for it?" The Aburame member asked his fellow ninja.

"Of course I am," Hiashi said, trying to sound indignant although at the moment he probably couldn't have told Shibi what the word meant.

"Very well," Shibi said, slowly pouring the last of the liquor into the two glasses. Tsume's eyes sparkled in the moonlight as she watched the worm slip with the last few drops of tequila into one of the glasses.

The two young men stared at the glass containing the worm. Tsume licked her lips, her pointy teeth showing due to her broad smile at the moment. This should be fun. Two of the most alpha of alpha males in all of Konoha arguing over a silly little worm to prove which of the two was the tougher guy. Really, she should have sold tickets, she thought to herself. There were a ton of kunoichi who would've paid to see this.

Hiashi's inner struggle was the greater she realized. That stupid Hyuuga decorum and reserve would never let him actually try to take the glass with the worm, seeing as how it was Shibi's promotion gift. But oh, how he wanted it. She almost laughed out loud. You didn't need Byakugan to see that.

Shibi wanted it, no doubt about it. She hadn't really thought about the importance of the poor dead little caterpillar to him and the significance it might hold for someone of his clan. She just knew he liked tequila. The two of them had found that they both had a taste for it when they had been introduced to it on one mission in the deep south of the Land of Wind, coincidentally one that Hiashi hadn't been assigned to. But Tsume also knew Shibi's secret and she was just waiting for him to make the offer to see how quickly Hiashi would accept.

"Hiashi, please, be my guest, take the glass with the worm," Shibi offered.

"No, I couldn't."

"But I insist."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. By all means..."

Hiashi already had the glass in his hand. "Ready?" he asked.

Shibi nodded. It was a good thing they were finishing the bottle they were almost out of salt and the limes were quite spent by now.

"Go," he said simply.

Lick. Drink. Bite. But this time, Hiashi had to bite and swallow the worm before finishing off with the lime.

He did and was inordinately proud to see that he had survived such a disgustingly wonderful event.

"Congratulations on your promotion, Shibi," he said as he realized he was wavering on his feet just a teensy bit. Tsume would have told him he was swaying to and fro. Shibi stepped closer to him.

"Congratulations to you Hiashi. You ate the worm, you should see visions tonight."

"Yes. I think you're right. I think I do...already," Hiashi said closing his eyes and pitching forward. Luckily Shibi caught him before he hit the ground.

Laughing, Tsume rose from her seat on the log and draped one of Hiashi's arms over her shoulder, Shibi draping the other over his own.

"Come on, let's get sleeping beauty home," she chuckled. Then she looked up at Shibi accusingly. "You're not the least bit drunk, are ya?"

Shibi just smiled. "The kikaichuu bugs are most effective at neutralizing poisons. Including alcohol."

"Man, you are no fun to get drunk with Shibi," Tsume laughed. "You don't _get_ drunk."

"Well, I _was_ a little drunk for a while," he said quite sincerely. "I wanted you to know that I appreciated your gift. But I became concerned about Hiashi and..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, you're a good guy, Aburame," she sighed. "C'mon let's get him tucked into bed."

Making their way to Hiashi's private apartment, they got the young Hyuuga out of his shirt and shoes and into his bed. Before they turned to leave, they heard him moan softly. "Why...why do I feel like I'm doing eighty-five-palmgrams?" he whimpered.

Tsume chuckled. "It's 8 trigrams, 64 palms, you idiot. And you've got the spins. C'mon, put one leg over the edge of the bed. Atta boy."

"Tsume," Hiashi moaned again, "I think you were right, I think it DID sneak up on me."

Shibi and Tsume looked at each other with concern. "One of us should probably stay with him."

"I've got it," Tsume said, waving Shibi aside. "I saw the mission board. You've got an early assignment. I'll stay with him til he sleeps it off. Poor little boy, I'll bet he's never had anything stronger than sake or that deer-piss beer Shikaku likes." She tucked an errant strand of long dark hair back out of Hiashi's face. He whimpered.

"You're sure you're okay?" Shibi asked.

"Yeah. I knew when to quit. I'm still a little buzzed but I'm fine. If you see Kuromaru around, tell him where I'm at."

"I shall. Let me know if you need any help with him."

She waved as Shibi left. Crossing the room she sat down in the lone chair opposite Hiashi's bed. She looked at the pile of his shoes and shirt lying puddled in the floor. An idea crossed her mind. A really really wicked idea. Something that you would _never_ do to your worst enemy. Only your best friend.

Quick as a wink she shed her own clothes and slipped into Hiashi's shirt then slid under the covers beside him. She couldn't wait to see the look on his face when he woke up in the morning.

The End

_**A/N: ** Well, I hope you enjoyed. This actually came from a song by the same name. I heard it on the radio yesterday and I was just like LOL the lyrics certainly seemed to suit Tsume. I hope you all enjoyed. Dedicated to Contessa-Hime who created this pairing in my mind._


End file.
